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Castle S05E19: "The Lives of Others"

100th episodes are not always reliable beacons of quality. The milestone always sounds like a big, celebratory thing, but just as often it's simply a mark a showrunner wants to hit in order to all but assure syndication for a series. More and more, though, that 100-episode quota is less-than-necessary for syndication—in fact, Castle already airs in reruns on TNT, so Andrew Marlowe and crew haven't had to worry about the big syndication question mark for some time. Perhaps because of that, Castle's 100th episode really was a simple, sweet celebration of the character and the series, rather than just some benchmark for future financial security.   

It was also an excuse for the show to go full Hitchcock in a cheeky, goofy tribute to the late, great master of suspense. The whole episode was a Rear Window scenario, featuring a laid-up Castle in a wheelchair, recovering from an accident that occurred during a pre-birthday ski trip with Beckett. Castle's mom was off on a retreat somewhere, and Beckett had caught a new case involving a murdered IRS agent, so Castle was essentially left to his own devices all day long. Somewhere along the way, Alexis decided to buy him a pair of binoculars, which led to the first of several very explicit references to Rear Window throughout the episode, which probably didn't need to be there. Then again, I met a 20-something the other day who had never seen a single movie prior to 1980, so maybe the references did serve a purpose.

Castle didn't use his newly found free time to write, or to really do anything of use. Instead, he actually picked up the binoculars and started spying on his neighbors in the building across the way. It all started out innocently enough with a bit of minor voyeurism. But then Castle fixated on a young couple who were on the verge of sexual congress; because of course he did. But suddenly, another man came into the apartment, forcing the young woman to hide her other man, and to scramble to find a way to push him out of the apartment before the boyfriend found out. Unfortunately, she failed to see her secret guy's fedora lying on the ground, and the boyfriend eventually took notice. Castle was enraptured by the will he/won't he scenario now in front of him, though that turned to panic when the boyfriend decided to confront the girl by pulling a knife on her and dragging her into the bedroom, where Castle couldn't see what might be happening.

Nevertheless, Castle was convinced that a murder had taken place, pulling Beckett and the team into the situation by having them visit the neighbor's apartment. But when Ryan and Esposito didn't find anything, Castle was dumbstruck. He knew what he'd seen, but nobody believed him.

Considering just how blatant of a Rear Window riff this was, it's telling that I was so willing to go along with it almost exclusively on the merits of Nathan Fillion's burgeoning paranoia and obsession. Castle is an obsessive character, one who often treats murder investigations like trifling puzzles devoid of any real human connection or tragedy. Which isn't to say that he doesn't feel anything, but it's obvious that Castle takes his inspiration more from a detached, mechanical mindset, where it's all about just connecting all the dots. Here, Fillion gave one of his more wonderfully frazzled performances, portraying a man just this side of desperate while maintaining the air of silliness and fun that Castle so desperately needs to stay afloat. He grumbled and pouted at every rebuff by his colleagues, and he seemed genuinely thrilled when Alexis took an interest in the case. Watching the two of them eat popcorn as they watched the neighbor do totally dicey things, like drag a rolled up carpet out of the apartment and wander into the bedroom with nothing but a paint mask and rubber gloves, was simultaneously a bit disturbing and also mildly hilarious.

Even better was the conclusion, which featured Castle and crew frantically charging into the neighbor's apartment after it appeared that Beckett had been attacked by the killer, and discovering... a surprise party! Yup, the whole thing was a set-up, perpetrated by an apparently way cleverer Beckett than we ever knew existed. The victim and murderer? Students in Castle's mom's acting class. Even Captain Gates, who'd enjoyed one of her more memorable moments of screaming bloody murder at Castle earlier in the episode, was in on the whole thing. In this regard, the episode almost flew around Rear Window entirely before landing on something closer to David Fincher's The Game, a movie in which Michael Douglas's rich asshole character is put through elaborately staged paces that at times seem so intricate and complex as to defy all manner of reason and logistics. This was certainly not as ludicrous as that, though it did require an expertly tuned understanding of Castle's mindset and personality in order for it to ever have worked. I guess the understanding here is that Beckett is such a person with such an understanding, which is wonderful, but also maybe a little terrifying. I'm trying to think of how I'd react if my girlfriend displayed such an innate and all-encompassing understanding of my psyche, and every scenario I picture ends with me having a complete mental breakdown.

The only problem with "The Lives of Others" is that the aforementioned IRS murder ended up getting shoved completely into the background, to the point where I actively forgot about that investigation every single time we cut back to Castle. It wasn't a terrible mystery, but the culprit was telegraphed way too early (note: it's always the guy with the terrible facial hair), and Beckett's sudden and complete understanding of how the murder was "staged" went beyond mere serendipity and entered the realm of the ludicrous. Then again, she'd just managed to stage an entire fake murder for her boyfriend to surreptitiously witness, so maybe we should just start being afraid of her now.

Otherwise, this was about as delightful an episode of Castle as you could hope for, given the anniversary. It's nice to be so thoroughly reminded of why you still like a TV show, especially after you've seen 100 episodes of it.

What'd you think of the episode?

– I didn't want to sully the main write-up with any Comic Book Guy-level nitpicking over the logistics of Castle's murder party reveal, but holy hell, how did Beckett manage to rent a giant empty apartment for a week? Also, was it already furnished? Were those acting students just so in love with Castle's mom's teaching that they were willing to basically drop everything and do this for a week? How did Beckett know Castle would suddenly think of the refrigerator?!? Phew. Okay, I'm done. No, I don't actually want anyone to try and answer these questions. I just wanted to say them out loud to get them out of my system. I'm good now.

– Ryan: "Watching a phone won't make it ring. I learned that in junior high." I swear, every other episode Ryan says something that makes me want to hug him and just tell him everything's going to be okay. Which makes last week's sudden badassening of the character all the more inexplicable and hilarious.

– Apparently, Castle and Beckett were planning on going to Bora Bora for his birthday, prior to the skiing accident. So yes, I'd say that Beckett has taken to Castle's fabulously wealthy lifestyle just fine, since she's apparently not even batting an eye at the notion of multiple expensive getaways within weeks of each other.

– Pretty sure I lack the rage and gumption to ever actually kill someone. That said, if I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me with a guy who wears a fedora, I'd at least have to stop and think about it for a second.

– There was definitely a bit of Grace Kelly influence in Stana Katic's party dress at the end there.  

– Someone please make me an animated .GIF of Esposito and Ryan doing the Charlie's Angels pose, so that I might repurpose it later for my own nefarious ends. 

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Castle S05E06: "The Final Frontier"

I don't know that there are enough nerdy superlatives out there to describe last night's Castle. "The Final Frontier" was pure, unadulterated, in-jokey fan service for sci-fi dorks everywhere. It was 44 minutes of non-stop references, sight gags, nods, winks, and whatever else to whatever cheeseball sci-fi you may have loved growing up. It was also quite possibly the dumbest episode of Castle since last year's zombie fiasco. However, in this case, I mean "dumb" as a compliment.

This is the kind of silly, silly, SILLY stuff I like when I watch Castle. Sure, it's hokey as hell, but now that Stana Katic has finally morphed from gruff straightwoman to willing goofball, the series has effectively become a showcase not just for Nathan Fillion's comedic talents, but for a bonafide comedy duo. My favorite thing by far this season is that Beckett's uber-tragic back story has given way to some honest-to-god quirkiness and a surprisingly game attitude for whatever Castle might be into this week. So when "The Final Frontier" brought Castle and company to a sci-fi convention, Beckett wasn't just standing around, grimacing at all the nerdspeak and cosplay. In fact, we learned that Beckett has her own nerdy history she's been covering up all these years.

Her past nerdiness pertained to a barely-seen fake sci-fi show called Nebula 9, a campy, Farscape-esque space series featuring an adult captain and a crew of cadets gallivanting around the galaxy as the last remaining remnants of humanity. Beckett apparently loved this show in college. So much so, in fact, that she used to dress up as one of the show's sexier stars. You can imagine how Castle might react to such a discovery.

Nebula 9 had been off the air for years, but a small, dedicated fanbase still kept up the cause, even going to the trouble of hiring the show's former captain (Eureka's Ed Quinn, clearly having the time of his life) to do a "fan experience" event, where fans could dress up as the cadets and act out a scene with the actor portraying their hero. Unfortunately, the experience was ruined when the body of the event's organizer was found on the set, with a giant laser hole through her chest.

Yes. A laser. Somebody shot this poor woman with a genuine laser, a revelation that both Castle and Beckett responded to with appropriate levels of confusion. Since when are phasers real? They're not, of course, but in the world of Castle, no nerd fantasy, no matter how ludicrous, can ever be out of the realm of possibility. So as we learned, the real-life phaser came from a local Bronx electrician, played by Star Trek: Deep Space Nine's Armin Shimerman. It turned out the guy had made himself a little business creating real-world versions of sci-fi weaponry. Everything from Klingon bat'leths to lasers that could actually blow a coaster-shaped hole in someone's chest. The liberal inside me was outraged by the thought of this unlicensed weapons manufacturing, but the nerd in me thought it was kind of the coolest thing ever.

Shimerman was just one of a few major sci-fi influences on this particular episode. Most notably Jonathan Frakes, Commander Riker himself, directed it, and even made a near-unrecognizable cameo as Richard Castle's number one fan. And then there was Quinn, hamming it up as actor Gabriel Winters as Captain Whatshisname from Nebula 9. It takes a lot of ham to out-ham Nathan Fillion, but Quinn pretty much did it. He was equal parts Tim Allen in Galaxy Quest and Troy McClure as he smirked his way through smarmy line after smarmy line. That he never broke down into some fit of self-loathing realization made his character even better. By the end of the episode, he was still bragging about threesomes with cosplaying fan girls—even the ones who gave him the clap.

The only knock I have against "The Final Frontier" is that throughout most of it, I could barely remember what was going on with the mystery. The positive side of that is that I was too busy laughing to care. And the ending did wrap things up in a wonderfully stupid way that I certainly was not expecting. And no, I'm not just talking about Stana Katic as the sexy alien cannibal. Though that was pretty good, too.

– While Beckett's nerdy past was something of a revelation, I doubt anyone out there was surprised to learn Ryan is a fantasy geek. I bet his D&D; games are hilarious.

– "I played a lawyer in a well-regarded film that never came out. I think I know something about the law." —Ed Quinn, killing it.

– Jonathan Frakes has only directed one other episode of Castle, all the way back in 2009. It was called "Kill the Messenger" and I barely remember it. This one I don't think I'll have much trouble remembering.

– Finding out Alexis enjoys cosplaying at sci-fi conventions was funny, but Castle's reaction to her wearing an outfit that highlighted her womanly curves was just about perfect. Their "conversation" about it later was similarly priceless.

– It's terrifying to me that our nation's gun laws haven't caught up with the recent surge in black-market laser pistols being used in violent crime. I urge you on this Election Day to vote for the candidate who will help stem the tide of laser-related violence in our country.

– The Stana Katic grumpy disappointment face (see above) forever. FOREVER.

Castle "The Final Frontier" Photos

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Castle S05E17: "Scared to Death"

After a two-week break following one of the better (if still ridiculous) dramatic arcs the series has had in a while, I was kind of hoping that we'd return to a rejuvenated Castle. It's not that this season hasn't mostly delivered—outside of some of its more lackluster standalone episodes, it's largely been quite solid—but after such a dramatic, James Brolin-flavored rush, and a couple of weeks to catch our breath, I was ready to return to the fun-lovin' murder-solvin', divorced-from-any-larger-story context. We certainly got that, but beyond a few good laughs, "Scared to Death" might have been the worst episode of the season yet.

"Scared to Death" lives in the same problematic area that last season's zombie episode took up residence in. The premise, which involved the thoroughly hokey notion of a spooky, demonic DVD that kills its viewers three days after they view it, was mired in a supernatural kookiness that might be believable in, say, a particularly murder-filled episode of Scooby Doo, but made no sense in a show that is, by and large, predicated in real-world crime-solving. I grant you that much of what happens on Castle is kind of silly and unbelievable, but there's a difference between, say, a crime-solving author with a CIA agent father tagging along on endless murder investigations with a super-hot lady detective whose mother was killed in a massive, far-reaching conspiracy involving corrupt senators and god knows what else, and actual evil spirits coming back and killing people.

Of course, actual evil spirits were nowhere to be found in "Scared to Death." Just like the dumb, dumb, dumb zombies episode, this one has an entirely corporeal evil at the center of it. But for long stretches of "Scared to Death," Castle, as well as Esposito and Ryan, were periodically convinced that something creepy, kooky, and altogether ooky was going on. Beckett, for her part, remained unconvinced, as any sane person should have. She attempted to reason with her suddenly cowardly compatriots, and even volunteered to view the DVD herself, despite grave warnings from Castle, who accidentally watched it at the crime scene.

And speaking of the video, it was maybe one of the silliest things I've seen mature adults attempt to appear fearful of on a major television program. It was an obnoxious hodgepodge of The Ring-inspired imagery that looked like it was constructed by a 16-year-old with terrible taste in horror movies and a fondness for crappy video-editing filters. And yet its hilariously delivered warning of, "You saw it. Three days. You die." was somehow completely terrifying to Castle, a grown-ass man who's seen plenty of other seemingly supernatural events pass by with entirely reasonable explanations.

It's not that I don't appreciate Castle's occasional childlike qualities. I like that he's a big, silly man-baby who plays the coward when it's funny, but can still be heroic when real trouble comes. But the writers' insistence of putting their characters through such nonsense plots is never not awful. These people are not stupid. We've watched them evolve over five seasons now, and the idea that Castle was actually terrified that a video was going to kill him was maybe just a bit more than I could take.

It was especially ridiculous given that the writers so clearly hated this plot idea, too. The Castle crew brought up The Ring no fewer than three times during the episode, which included a particularly bizarre cameo from Wes Craven, whom Castle called up to "hypothetically" discuss a way out of his predicament. It's one thing to maybe knock on the fourth wall a bit and poke fun at how stupid something like this is, but "Scared to Death" seemed almost embarrassed at times by its utter lack of originality.

Almost nothing about this episode worked. Not Castle and Beckett wandering into a spooky old hotel briefly seen in the video. Not Castle and Beckett wandering into an insane asylum on a dark and stormy night. Not the realization that all the victims were witnesses in the trial of a serial killer. Not the fact that the serial killer's dead body had apparently gone missing from its grave. None of it was scary, creepy, or even particularly entertaining. It just felt like the tossed-out entrails of various horror scripts being stitched together into a lazy, altogether unpleasant... thing.

Really, the only tolerable thing "Scared to Death" provided was a few decent jokes. Beckett's constant teasing of Castle over his death fears (not to mention her frequent, only half-joking sexual advances) was fun, and Esposito and Ryan's bro-dude fist-bumping over their own mutual cowardice in not wanting to watch the video was pretty great. But other than those few amusing bits, "Scared to Death" was pretty much a wash. Too often the episode became bogged down in its own unenthusiastic usage of tired horror tropes, and the result, which featured the daughter of a man originally accused of the crimes committed by the dead serial killer using the "scary" video and a defibrillator as a way to extract revenge on the witnesses who originally fingered her dad—it was a bit much, really.

Some shows can do horror and make it work. Castle is not such a show. Maybe some day, the show's writers will figure that out.

– Ryan's assertion that he couldn't view the video because he's trying to have a child and doesn't want any evil spirits causing him and his wife bad juju was maybe the most honest character moment of this entire episode.

– I don't know why Wes Craven was in this episode. He didn't even make The Ring. Was Gore Verbinski just busy?

– In order to keep Craven on the phone, Castle immediately launched into a genuflecting diatribe on how great all of Craven's movies are, including his most recent movie, My Soul to Take. First rule in praising a director: Don't talk about how great a movie they made that everyone hated and nobody went to see was. They won't believe you.

– Just a quick "You're super old!" reminder that The Ring is an 11-year-old movie.

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What to watch on Monday, September 24...

Much like last Thursday's What to Watch was pretty much overrun by NBC returns, tonight it's CBS's time to shine. With a handful of returns on top of a brand new addition to its Monday night line-up, "CBS Mondays" is shaping up to be a pretty decent night for television. THE SUMMER IS ALMOST OVER, GUYS! We've almost made it! And with that, let's take a look at what's on TV tonight:

SEASON 8 PREMIERE, 8pm, CBS
How I Met Your Mother
The series starts up just where it left off, with wedding bells ringing as Barney and Robin prepare for marriage. Of course, their concerns that the other will get cold feet and run sort of puts a downer on the whole event. All of the fears and pre-wedding jitters brings Ted right back to how he felt when he was about to marry Victoria—and how he was so adamant that she write her new fiancé a note describing that she left him at the altar. Phew, sounds like a heavy one!

SEASON FINALE, 8pm, The CW
The L.A. Complex
For the second week in a row, the CW is airing two new episodes of The L.A. Complex back-to-back, but THIS time the second episode (airing at 9pm) will also be the finale. If you're the kind of person who just likes to tie up loose ends, then you should make sure to at least catch the tail end of this two hour block. In the first "Xs and Os" everybody is panicking about the state of their lives: Abby worries about her impulsive behavior with Gary, Beth worries she'll lose Simon, Kall worries about his relationship with his father, Connor worries after his sister does something shocking, and Nick worries after suffering a career blow. Man, easy on the anxiety, folks! Then, in the finale, "Don't Say Goodbye," Connor gets uncomfortable with Charlotte and finds solace in Scienetics (I'm really hoping that's L.A. Complex code for Scientology, because it would be hilarious if this show went there) and Raquel gets ready for her big fund-raising event. Also, Beth keeps fighting for Simon. Maybe it's just something she should let go, did she ever think about that?

SERIES PREMIERE, 8:30pm, CBS
Partners
In CBS's brand new sitcom, two long-term business partners (one straight and one gay) are in the middle of a life-changing decision—for one of them: Joe (the straight one, I can only assume) is wavering on whether or not to ask his girlfriend to marry him. Good thing for good friends, right? When Louis makes an attempt to get involves (with the best of intensions of course), his efforts do more harm than good. Yep, sounds like a sitcom.

SEASON 2 PREMIERE, 9pm, CBS
2 Broke Girls
In "And the Hidden Stash" we kick off as Max and Caroline make their way up to a white-collar prison to visit Caroline's father (Steven Weber). Once there, he encourages them to show up at the Channing estate auction to buy a very specific item. Sounds just sketchy enough to work!

SEASON 5 PREMIERE, 10pm, ABC
Castle
In "After the Storm"—which is a very fitting title, don'tcha think?—Beckett and Castle re-evaluate their relationship after waking up from their heated night of passion. Spicy! While they work all of that out, they also have to deal with facing the folks who murdered Beckett's mother and who are now, subsequently, after Beckett, herself. Also, Beckett butts heads with a Senator. Wow, Beckett is really the center of conflict right now, isn't she?

PLUS ALL NEW EPISODES OF...
2012 Emmy Awards Fashion Wrap, SPECIAL, 8 p.m., TV Guide
Alphas, 8 p.m., Syfy
Basketball Wives LA, 8 p.m., VH1
Bones, 8 p.m., Fox
Dancing With the Stars: All Stars, LIVE SEASON PREMIERE, 8 p.m., ABC
Switched at Birth, 8 p.m., ABC Family
The L.A. Complex, TWO EPISODES BACK-TO-BACK—SEASON FINALE AT 9p.m.—8 p.m., The CW
The Voice, 8 p.m., NBC
WWE Monday Night Raw, 8 p.m., USA
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, 8:30 p.m., TLC
All on the Line, 9 p.m., Sundance
American Chopper, 9 p.m., Discovery
Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations, 9 p.m., Travel
Border Wars, 9 p.m., NatGeo
Blood, Lies, & Alibis, 9 p.m., Investigation Discovery
Get to Work, 9 p.m., Sundance
Love It or List It, 9 p.m., HGTV
Major Crimes, 9 p.m., TNT
Market Warriors, 9 p.m., PBS
T.I. and Tiny: The Family Hustle, 9 p.m., VH1
The Mob Doctor, 9 p.m., Fox
The Real Housewives of New York City, 9 p.m., Bravo
Warehouse 13, 9 p.m., Syfy
Chrissy & Mr. Jones, SEASON PREMIERE, 9:30 p.m., VH1
Mike & Molly, SEASON PREMIERE, 9:30 p.m., CBS
American Masters, 10 p.m., PBS
Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives, 10 p.m., Food
Fashion Police, EMMY AWARDS SPECIAL, 10 p.m., E!
Fast N' Loud, 10 p.m., Discovery
Gallery Girls, 10 p.m., Bravo
Hawaii Five-O, SEASON PREMIERE, 10 p.m., CBS
House Hunters, 10 p.m., HGTV
Lovetown, USA, 10 p.m., OWN
Revolution, 10 p.m., NBC
Ridiculousness, 10 p.m., MTV
House Hunters International, 10:30 p.m., HGTV
The Inbetweeners, 10:30 p.m., MTV
Get To Work, 10:30 p.m., Sundance

LATE-NITE HIGHLIGHTS...
Steve Martin and a performance by Gotye on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35 p.m., CBS
David Spade on Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35 p.m., NBC
Julianna Margulies, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, and a performance by The Killers on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 12 a.m., ABC Blake Shelton, Serena Williams, and Andrew Rannells on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:37 a.m., NBC
Dennis Quaid and Ellie Kemper on The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson, 12:37 a.m., CBS

What are you watching tonight?

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Castle S05E14: "Reality Star Struck"

It's nearly Valentine's Day here in the real world, which means that most of the shows on television right now are fumbling all over themselves trying to offer up the most love-laced plots possible for their viewers. Last night's Castle was no exception. With that most forcibly romantic of days looming, Castle and Beckett were almost assured to get into some kind of hilarious relationship misunderstanding for the sake of thematic appropriateness. Fortunately, that misunderstanding didn't force them to hash out any personal issues or get into any seriously heated arguments. In fact, for the most part, Castle and Beckett just got to enjoy each other's company this week amid a surprising amount of in-house character comedy. So much so, in fact, that I damn near forgot about the mystery for long stretches of the episode.

Granted, the mystery itself wasn't the most well-reasoned thing Castle's ever done. The show opened with one of the more ludicrous scenes I've seen on a police procedural in a while: A reality TV producer, the figurehead behind the enormously popular Financial Channel series The Real Housewives of Wall Street (I know... I know!) was chatting idly with a marketing executive over the show's new opening credit sequence when a sprightly assistant burst in and exclaimed, "Sir, there's been a murder!" with all the shock and dismay of a man forced to report that there's no more coffee in the break room. Things did improve once Castle and Beckett arrived at the murder scene to find the most hated Housewife lying peacefully in a bus stop with an expensive knife in her back. Symbolism, much?

The woman, a former assistant to one of the Housewives who'd recently begun an affair with the Housewife's husband, had apparently come to New York to make it big, a fact that her family did not necessarily approve of. As Castle and Beckett dug deeper and deeper into her life, it became clear that this woman had spent as much time trying to find a way out of the show as she had digging herself deeper into its manufactured drama. Her apparent distaste for the ugliness of it all possibly created several motives for killing her, as did her apparent interest in another cast member.

The details for the mystery were suitably labyrinthine, seemingly disconnected from one another for extending periods of time before finally coming together in a relatively hurried, unsatisfying conclusion. It's safe to say that the harried, utterly spat-out confession from the killer felt like a scene filmed in about 20 minutes as a last minute pick-up shot. I assume the writers always intended make our eventually revealed culprit the killer, but it didn't seem like anyone really felt much like focusing on the reveal.

Maybe that's because so much of "Reality Star Struck" was heavily focused on Castle, Beckett, and the rest of the team at home. Castle and Beckett spent large chunks of the episode musing to one another about how much better each of their Valentine's gifts to the other was going to be. Castle was particularly proud of the expensive earrings he'd bought for Beckett, but was unsure of the best way to give them to her. Leave it to Castle's mother to suggest something a little bit sneaky, like hiding them in her coat pocket and waiting for her to find them. Castle loved the idea... until he mistakenly left the baubles in Captain Gates' coat.

Let's back up a second. One thing that I am beginning to learn now is that any episode in which Captain Gates and Castle connect, even in the most frivolous ways, will end with their relationship further scarred and battered than it was at the outset of the hour. In this case, we learned early on that Gates is an obsessive Real Housewives viewer, and when she discovered that nobody else in the precinct watches the show, she outright demanded that everyone go home and watch it as a sort of horrible homework assignment. Except that Castle loved it. He stayed up all night watching episode after episode, and suddenly he and Gates had something to gab about. Great! Their relationship was saved!

Until, of course, he dropped those earrings into the wrong coat.

After a few failed attempts at taking the earrings back, Castle witheringly confessed his mistake to Beckett. Beckett was less livid than mortified. Did he leave a note? Yes. Was it a romantic note? Oh yes. Did he put her name on it? Castle couldn't recall, but he knew he'd put his own name down. Oh dear.

Eventually, Gates discovered the earrings, read the note, and summoned Castle to her office. Was their cover blown? Would Castle and Beckett never work together again?!?

Of course not. Castle, to his benefit, failed to put Beckett's name on the note, so Gates just thought that Castle was hitting on her! A married woman! Oh, that's much better.

Anyway, he thankfully managed to play it off as just a bad attempt at currying favor with the Captain, while Gates left under a cloud of her usual huffiness. Meanwhile, Castle and Beckett returned home to a glass of wine and Beckett's gift to Castle, which Castle had been giddy to receive all episode. So Beckett had him open up a drawer in her bedroom dresser, and in it he found... nothing! Wait, what? Why an empty drawer? Because it's now Castle's drawer. Beckett has cleared a permanent spot for Castle in her apartment, a sort of solidifying gesture on her behalf to show Castle she's serious.

You know, you can talk all you want about Valentine's Day's crass commercialism and TV's complicit role in it, but that little gesture genuinely brought a little smile out in me. Kudos to the Castle writers for taking what should have been another throwaway holiday-themed episode, and turning it into something honestly sweet. These days, that doesn't happen nearly often enough.

– So are we finally pulling the trigger on Esposito and Lanie getting back together? I'm fully okay with that, mind you. I just don't know if I have the stomach for any more will they/won't they out of them.

– Ryan is being called home regularly to attempt to impregnate his wife during ideal breeding hours, and he is apparently exhausted by this. There is a secret hope in me that Ryan's wife will just remain off-camera from now on, and that she will continue to make him do crazier and crazier things, effectively turning her into the show's Maris Crane. Anyone else on board with this?

– Thank you, Castle writers, for resisting the urge to offer up a "He went to Jared!" joke during Castle's earrings unveil. I don't even want to see that godawful advertising campaign made fun of. I just want it to be shunned and ignored until it returns to the grotesque hell-mouth from which it emerged, never to bother us again.

– How weird is it that Castle has been nailing, of all things, the holiday episodes this season? First that great Christmas episode, and now a totally solid Valentine's episode? At this point, I can't WAIT to see what they come up with for Easter!

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Castle S05E13: "Recoil"

I've made no secret of my general disdain for Castle's more serious episodes. Especially the ones that hyperfocus on the ludicrous mother-murdering conspiracy that Beckett has spent the last five seasons digging through in fits and starts. I come to Castle for lighthearted crime-solving, to see these silly NYPD detective caricatures joke around, act vaguely ridiculous, and trade one-liners with Nathan Fillion. I watch the show for those things because it's good at those things, and up until recently, it's never been very good at doing much of anything else. Even in Castle's dumbest, most forgettable murder mysteries, there are usually some good lines or amusing character moments that remind me why I watch the show. In the more serious episodes, I almost never see much of anything that resembles those traits.

So color me utterly flabbergasted that I found "Recoil" to be such an enjoyable diversion. It was the very definition of a serious Castle episode: A girl was murdered, her body is tossed into an oil drum in a known homeless encampment, her teeth were callously removed, and her corpse was set aflame to avoid any measure of detection. But, after a surgical device with a serial number was found inside of her, her identity was established, and her ties to the real world were discovered. Unfortunately, those ties lead right back to Senator Bracken, a.k.a. The Man Who Killed Beckett's Mother.

I was wondering when the show would get around to bringing him back. You don't spend an entire season premiere establishing a new series villain without having larger plans for him. At least, I hoped not. There have definitely been a number of moments throughout this series where I've been plum convinced the writers were just making up the conspiracy junk on the fly. But based on Beckett's brief encounter with Bracken way back at the beginning of the season, and her interactions with him in this week's episode, I'm a believer. I genuinely think this may have been the smartest way to progress this story.

Part of it is Jack Coleman's completely disturbing lack of a moral compass, and not in that typical TV villain way, either. Most evil politicians in TV—outside of, say, The Wire, or The West Wing—tend to lean toward the cackling, sneering variety. Coleman isn't doing that. He's painting Bracken as a guy more or less just devoid of any form of empathy. He's pragmatic about his role as a villain, calm and collected in just about any situation, save for those that might jeopardize his stature or power. The only time he raised his voice in this episode was when he was about lose an opportunity to significantly raise his profile on the political stage. This guy doesn't care about much, but he has a very specific, very distinct Achilles heel. And it just so happens that Beckett is in prime position to take advantage of that.

You see, Bracken didn't kill the poor girl. In fact, she wasn't even the real designated target. Rather, the target was Bracken.

The team quickly discovered that the victim had potentially identified and followed a potential stalker of the senator, and after following said stalker into a parking garage, found herself on the wrong end of a bullet. For a long time, we didn't know who this stalker/potential assassin was, outside of a description involving long hair, a scraggly beard, and aviator shades. A partial license plate number helped identify a car in the garage that clearly belonged to the assassin—why else would there have been a sniper rifle in the trunk?—but for roughly half the episode, there was no name or key evidence to identify the subject. That is, of course, until Beckett went poring through some threatening letters the senator had received over the last few years, and found one with handwriting that matched a note found in the car.

In any other episode, with any other case, Beckett would have leapt up and dashed it down to forensics. But not this time. Instead, she hid the letter from Castle, and took it with her to... her therapist? Okay, sure. I suppose if I were in a major moral dilemma I couldn't tell anyone else about, I'd talk to my therapist too, especially if my therapist had the smooth, dulcet tones of Michael Dorn.

She considered burning the letter and just letting the killer do his dirty business. She agonized over this, reluctant even to tell her colleagues about the letter the next morning, after she'd decided not to burn it. But then Beckett saw the sister of the gunshot victim in the precinct. She saw her in tears, being consoled by Captain Gates. Suddenly, it stopped being about her. It stopped being just a matter of whether Bracken dies or not, but the collateral damage involved. That scene was one of the best character moments Beckett has had all season. Stana Katic has give us several strong performances this season, but this was probably her best dramatic scene, outside of that first encounter with Bracken during the premiere.

She had more good scenes later on. After discovering the identity of the suspect, she found herself walking straight into the guy in the elevator lobby of his SRO hotel. She could have killed him as he started to run away, but didn't. Why? "I saw the pain in his eyes," she said. In her mind, she'd found a kindred spirit. The man, a mechanic with a history of schizophrenia, had lost his son to an apparent suicide. A son, by the way, who just happened to be interning for Bracken. When it eventually came time to interrogate the man, she used her own tragedy to try to bring out a confession. Gates walking in on that scene was interesting, since it was the first time she'd really been exposed to this stuff. Castle tried to brush it off as Beckett just working to get the confession, but there was something about Beckett and Gates' later interaction that says Gates didn't quite buy that explanation. But it didn't matter, because investigators had reportedly found all they needed to convict the poor transient. A bomb vest he'd apparently made had been recovered, and thus, the case was closed.

But not for Beckett. It all seemed too sophisticated for a guy with schizophrenia off his meds, and it didn't explain away certain other case details. So instead of letting it drop, Beckett ordered an evacuation of the conference Bracken was supposed to speak at. Bracken was furious, especially after the bomb squad was initially unable to find any additional devices. What happened next was perhaps a bit ridiculous, but it was really the only way this episode could have ended. Beckett, identifying the man who was the real assassin all along, ran straight at Bracken and shielded him from an exploding limousine. The assassin was caught, Bracken was unharmed, and Beckett was the heroine of the day.

The only part of "Recoil" that left me a bit cold was the last scene. For most of the episode, Bracken and Beckett went back and forth in primarily knowing, nonspecific dialogue that nonetheless managed to say a lot without having to say a lot, if you know what I mean. Their last exchange was a wonderful mix of uncomfortable gratitude from Bracken, and smirking (temporary) satisfaction from Beckett. I would have been perfectly satisfied if the episode had ended right as Bracken turned to the cameras and began delivering his speech to the press. But then the episode went on for about one scene too long, trying to wrap up the mystery behind Bracken's assassins by showing Castle and Beckett watching a major political magnate and Super PAC chairman being arrested for organizing the hit.

Why did we need that? The idea that there's more going on with Bracken than just an evil man doing evil things was intriguing, but I guess the writers aren't planning on heading in that direction. It seems that Bracken, all by his lonesome, will remain the primary focus of Beckett's ire until he either ends up dead, in jail, or both. That's okay, though, because Bracken is proving to be a most interesting nemesis for Beckett. Again, I come to this show for the comedy and silliness, but if every now and again, a dramatic episode of this caliber wants to come along, I certainly am not going to complain.

– Fillion didn't have much to do this week. Normally I'm not fond of episodes where he gets pushed to the back, but he made a good sounding board for Katic, who owned this episode.

– Guys? Really? We're going to send Esposito and Ryan to the senator's mansion in an attempt to keep Beckett's involvement in the investigation a secret? There aren't any other detectives we can send that he most definitely won't recognize? Sigh.

– Dear Castle writers: E. 72nd street is not in downtown Manhattan. Hell, it's not even midtown. You are straight uptown at that point.

– Prediction: Second-to-last episode of this season features Captain Gates finding out all the crap Beckett has been hiding since the end of last season, and it results in her once again exiting the force and going rogue for a season finale that probably involves Bracken winding up either dead or arrested. I kind of hope it wraps up less predictably than that, but I'm not confident it will.

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What to watch on Monday, February 4...

8pm, CBS
How I Met Your Mother
"P.S. I Love You" gives new meaning to the word "Canadastravaganza" when Barney uncovers a Behind the Music-esque profile of the rise and fall of Robin Sparkles. Stuffed into this 22-minute outing like the filling in a Tim Horton's bear claw are notable Canadian personages Alan Thicke, Jason Priestley, Paul Shaffer, Alex Trebek, K.D. Lang, Steven Page, Geddy Lee, Luc Robitaille, and Dave Thomas, along with honorary Ottawan James Van Der Beek returning as Robin's ex, Simon.

8pm, Syfy
Continuum
A scientist developing clean energy technology is murdered, and Kiera suspects Liber8's handiwork. Elsewhere in "Matter of Time," Liber8 head honcho Kagame mysteriously arrives in the present day, while Kellog strikes it rich on the stock market.

8pm, ABC Family
Switched at Birth
Kathryn volunteers to work at Carlton in order to cozy up to Bay, and Daphne experiences discomfort around Travis. In other news, this installment's marvelously baroque title, "The Acquired Inability to Escape," is setting an early high bar for my favorite TV episode title of the week.

SEASON 7 PREMIERE, 8:30pm, CBS
Rules of Engagement
As the old adage goes, the only things you can count on in life are death, taxes, and Rules of Engagement returning to plug a hole in CBS's midseason lineup. "Liz Moves In" finds Liz wearing out her welcome as a houseguest of Jeff and Audrey's, while Adam and Timmy forge a ping-pong partnership.

9pm, Fox
The Following
"The origin of Hardy and Carroll's relationship is revealed," according to the episode summary for "The Poet's Fire." I'll bet they were both minor league ballplayers scraping by on nothing but a dream and a love of the game, and they bonded on the rundown team bus between Kenosha and the Quad Cities, but then Carroll was all, "Hey bro, you ever kill anyone and then read some poetry about it? It ROCKS!" and Hardy was all, "WTF dude?! You read poetry?!" And that was the beginning of the end...

SERIES PREMIERE, 10pm, TBS
Monday Mornings
Based on a novel by co-executive producer Sanjay Gupta, David E. Kelley's latest foray into a world of dedicated and quirk-bedazzled professionals centers on a fictional Portland, Ore. hospital. Jamie Bamber, Jennifer Finnigan, Alfred Molina, and Ving Rhames lead the cast.

10pm, NBC
Deception
Mia's debutante ball ends in disarray when the mind-boggling truth about her mother comes out in "Why Wait." Meanwhile, Joanna puts her relationship with Will on hold so she can hurry up and start solving Vivian's murder, since that's why the good people at the National Broadcasting Company have seen fit to give her a television program in the first place.

10pm, ABC
Castle
Sinister Senator William H. Bracken is back in Castle and Beckett's sights after they uncover links to his involvement in a woman's murder. Can the detective duo bring the pernicious politician to justice? Why am I talking like the narrator from the Adam West Batman? Find out in "Recoil"—same Castle-time, same Castle-channel!

10pm, CBS
Hawaii Five-0
The series goes back to its roots with "Hookman," a remake of an Emmy-winning 1973 episode of Original Recipe Hawaii Five-0. Guest-star and director Peter Weller plays a maimed man who blames some cops—including McGarrett's father—for the loss of both his hands, and now is out for revenge. Max Weinberg, of Conan and E Street Band fame, also guest-stars... though, really, if you're gonna have a drummer appear on an episode about an amputee, how do you not call Def Leppard's Rick Allen? Who dropped that ball?

LATE-NITE:
– William H. Macy, Harland Williams, and Vintage Trouble on Conan, 11pm, TBS
– Guest host Dave Grohl on Chelsea Lately, 11pm, E!
– Former D.C. public schools chancellor Michelle Rhee on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, 11pm, Comedy Central
– Justice Sonia Sotomayor on The Colbert Report, 11:30pm, Comedy Central
– Hugh Jackman, Jessica Chastain, and Michael Bolton on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35pm, NBC
– Gov. Chris Christie and Elvis tribute artist Cody Ray Slaughter on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35pm, CBS
– Melissa McCarthy, Mark Duplass, and Anita Baker on Jimmy Kimmel Live, 11:35pm, ABC
– Russell Brand, Katharine McPhee, and Jim James on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:37am, NBC
– Zooey Deschanel and Adhir Kalyan on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37am, CBS

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ABC OPENS UP ITS CASKETT

... Castle fans, this one's for you. ABC has asked for an extra episode of the semi-romantic procedural to add to the current season, bringing the total to 24 episodes. The show just aired its thirteenth episode last night, and the bonus episode means one extra paycheck for its stars, one less repeat we'll have to suffer through, and one tiny price hike on the DVD set. [TV Line]

RATINGS FOR THE DOGS AND RATINGS THAT DOGGED IT

... Animal Planet's Puppy Bowl IX set a personal record on Sunday, netting 12.4 million unique viewers over the course of its day-long run. That's up from last year's 8.7 million viewers. The infamous Super Bowl blackout boosted ratings 54 percent as viewers tired of watching Shannon Sharpe argue with himself by taking every possible stance on a subject did some channel-surfing and realized that puppies said more about football than the broadcasters did once their planned coverage was interrupted. [THR]

... Note to self: Don't debut a show the day after the Super Bowl. The hungover and rioting masses did not tune into David E. Kelley's new TNT medical drama Monday Mornings. Only 1.34 million viewers showed up once same-day DVR numbers were factored in. The second episode of Dallas's second season didn't do much better, hitting a series low. [Deadline Hollywood]

BUSINESS TIME

... NBC is rolling out the past and has ordered a pilot for the remake of Ironside, the '60s drama about a police detective who continues to be a badass after he's put in a wheelchair by an on-the-job shooting. The handsome Blair Underwood (The Event) will star. This sounds like a great way to bring in that 18-49 year old demographic! [EW]

... ABC has ordered a multi-camera comedy pilot starring John Leguizamo. The show would be loosely based on Leguizamo's life as a husband and father living in New York. Ooh! I hope they include that time he played Violator the fatso clown in Spawn! [Deadline Hollywood]

... HBO has signed a development deal with George R.R. Martin, author of the "Song of Ice and Fire" novels that Game of Thrones is based on. Martin is also an executive producer of the HBO fantasy drama, and usually writes one episode per season. Disgruntled "Song of Ice and Fire" fan: "He could have used the time he spent signing the contract writing the next book, sheesh!" [Deadline Hollywood]

CASTING NEWS

... Friends co-stars Matthew Perry and Courteney Cox will reunite on NBC's Go On when the latter guest-stars. Cox will play a woman who Anne sets up with Ryan in an April episode. [THR]

... Charles Michael Davis (The Game) has landed a role in The CW's The Originals, the proposed spin-off of The Vampire Diaries. Davis will play Marcel, a vampire protégé of Klaus. The Originals will be introduced as a backdoor pilot in the April 25 episode of The Vampire Diaries. If The CW likes what it sees, it will order The Originals to series for next season. [Deadline Hollywood]

... CBS's summer series Under the Dome, based on the Stephen King novel, has cast True Blood's Aisha Hinds. Hinds, who played Lafayette's weird witch doctor friend in the HBO vampire drama, will play a Los Angeles-based lawyer who gets stuck in the small town of Chester's Mill when a mysterious shield surrounds it, trapping its inhabitants inside. [TV Line]

... Grey's Anatomy's Brooke Smith will pop up on Showtime's Ray Donovan in a recurring role. She'll play a nurse taking care of the title character's ill brother. Ray Donovan, about a Hollywoof "fixer," debuts on June 30. [THR]

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Castle S05E04: "Murder, He Wrote"

Every once in a while, the writers of Castle suddenly remember that Castle the character is ludicrously rich. Well, not "James Patterson rich," as Castle himself put it last night, but the guy's got a boatload of money. I think I sometimes become numb to that fact, even when I see him lounging around that massive Manhattan abode of his, mostly because pretty much everyone on New York-based television has an unrealistically huge apartment. But this week, when Castle absconded with Beckett to his gargantuan weekend house in the Hamptons, we all got a healthy reminder that Castle is very much of the 1%.

Considering the current political climate and general opinion of the very wealthy in America today, it's interesting that those in charge of Castle haven't opted to maybe make his wealth a bit more of a modest factor in the show. It's one thing to have him drop a few grand on a storage locker, but watching him give a wide-eyed Beckett a tour of his multimillion dollar Hamptons pad was perhaps the most direct and pointed example of "HEY LOOK HOW RICH THIS GUY IS" we've had in quite a while. Beckett, for her part, seemed about as taken aback by all this luxury as, well, probably anyone who isn't a multimillionaire would be. I couldn't help but wonder whether or not this was going to be a moment where Beckett might suddenly feel wildly out of place in her new relationship, but after a few reassuring statements from Castle, she all but embraced her new lifestyle.

Of course the pair was there for a romantic getaway, with intentions of smooching naked in Castle's pool, but it turned out someone else had gotten there first. Namely, a bleeding, sand-covered gentleman who wandered in from the beach and proceeded to promptly die in the aforementioned pool. In an episode called "Murder, He Wrote" it was inevitable that a death would interrupt the couple's good time. After all, can you ever remember Jessica Fletcher not running into a fresh corpse any time she took a vacation?

The local constabulary promptly scooped up a local meth head—who just happened to be sleeping on the beach with the victim's wallet in-hand—and decided he must be the culprit. Castle wasn't so sure, and despite Beckett's initial pleas to drop it in favor of some sexy times, Castle couldn't, because Castle can't let any murder go unsolved. In any other couple, I'd decry Castle as being kind of selfish and outright mean to his beloved, but considering who he's dating, it was no surprise that later in the episode, Beckett was just as determined to solve the thing as he was.

What made "Murder, He Wrote" such a delight was the way Castle and Beckett went about investigating the mystery while mostly on the sidelines. The local police chief (Eric McCandless, who reminded me an awful lot of Steve Guttenberg) initially couldn't stand the idea of Castle and his "hooker friend" (hilarious misunderstandings!) nosing around his case, even going so far as to arrest them both when they begin grilling the victim's former mistress. But once he realized Beckett was actually a big-city police detective, he practically begged at their feet for some assistance. As he explained, crime isn't exactly frequent in the Hamptons, outside of the occasional drug bust. He'd never even pulled his gun before.

So Beckett and Castle set about finding the real murderer. We learned that the victim was a snitch during the Lehman Brothers scandal, ratting out several coworkers who eventually went to prison, while he got off scot-free. We also found out that he had a dispute with his former neighbor, a scar-faced tank of a man (Don Stark) who was perfectly happy to dine with Castle and Beckett, but became incensed when Castle not-so-subtly asked him where he was at the time of the murder. And not because he was upset about being accused of murder, but because he was upset about being accused of such a sloppy murder. As he put it, if it were his job, they'd never have found the body.

All the while, Esposito and Ryan were in the mix, doing New York City legwork that involved interviewing the victim's wife, investigating his real-estate holdings in the city, and doggedly pursuing the identity of Beckett's secret boyfriend. Esposito in particular can't seem to stomach the idea of a secret being kept from him. He apparently went through the entire list of Beckett's exes over the course of the episode, only to come up empty-handed. Ultimately it was Ryan who inadvertently uncovered Beckett and Castle's secret, when he found himself interrogating a witness who'd previously been questioned by the couple in the Hamptons. Ryan is certainly not known for his "bad cop" routine, but as soon as the suspect let slip that Castle had a "girlfriend" with him, Ryan suddenly morphed into the second coming of Homicide-era Andre Braugher. He eventually wrested Beckett's identity from the suspect, but never revealed the information to Esposito. Either he really likes knowing something that Esposito doesn't, or he has plans to inflict a bit of friendly blackmail on his secretly coupled cohorts. Either way, how great was it to actually see Ryan do something other than play the meek sidekick for once?

Eventually the mystery wound its way to a somewhat convoluted—but genuinely surprising—revelation that the victim had, in fact, been in the meth business himself. Esposito and Ryan raided one of his real-estate holdings only to discover a mini meth lab in the basement. The blame eventually shifted to a local dock worker who'd reportedly been dealing meth himself, with the motive purportedly being that he was upset about being muscled out of his own racket. But even that turned out to be a red herring, a set-up by one of the chief's deputies, who was the other drug dealer all along. In the end, the Hamptons police chief fired his weapon for the first time, got the bust, and finally became a man, or something. As for Castle and Beckett, they finally got their romantic alone time, safe in the knowledge that the bad guys had been bested once again.

Too bad about the promos for next week, though: As great as tonight's episode was, I'm not sure I'm looking forward to the next new episode (which won't be until October 29). Seeing the preview, it looks like the writers are going back to the well with one of those "maybe Castle is the murderer" plots. No he isn't, okay? The show is called Castle. Unless it's suddenly about to turn into a dark series about a murder writer committing the crimes in his own stories, he didn't do it. Stop it, writers.

– Happy 87th birthday to Jessica Fletcher herself, Angela Lansbury. No, she wasn't in this week's episode, but with an episode called "Murder, He Wrote" I felt I'd be remiss not to call this out.

– I'm not sure what was the more bizarre bit of fan pandering last night, Castle's use of the word "serenity" in a sentence, or his name-dropping of the internet's favorite portmanteau for Castle and Beckett, "Caskett."

– That awkward pause where the police chief didn't realize it was time for him to leave Castle's house. We've all been there, right?

– Nathan Fillion moment of the night: two of them, namely each time he tried to subtly bring up the murder in conversation, only to completely bork it up. Fun fact: Writers are not always particularly smooth in conversation.

Castle "Murder, He Wrote" Photos

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Castle S05E03: "Secret's Safe With Me"

"Secret's Safe With Me" was my favorite episode of this (admittedly young) season so far, despite having the worst ending we've seen yet. Why? Because it simultaneously managed to juggle the Castle/Beckett romance secrecy and an interesting (up to a point) mystery in a way that was very nearly successful across the board. Until that ending, of course. But more on that later.

Last night's adventure saw Castle and Beckett working the murder of a young girl in a seedy motel room; she had scribbled the word "LIE" in her own blood. What lie was she referring to? None, actually. After a bit of investigating, which led the pair to a local storage facility, Castle came to the startling conclusion that the blood-scrawled message actually referred to the number 317, which could perhaps be the number of a locker inside the storage facility. That was, indeed, the case, and it just so happened that the locker in question belonged to the dead woman's twin brother, who also died under mysterious circumstances. It was also up for auction.

A brief aside: I watch Storage Wars. Yes, I know, it's terrible, bottom-feeding television. It's nothing but sweaty, questionably bearded men picking through the remnants of someone's former life in order to make a chintzy profit. But you know what? It's watchable. It's TV comfort food, meant to be taken in unhealthy doses. It's like Law & Order in that I will never, ever seek out the show on my own, but if there's a marathon on one lazy afternoon, I won't leave the couch for five hours.

With this in mind, I was really hoping "Secret's Safe With Me" was going to have a little fun with the storage auction subgenre of television. You figure at least ten episodes of Castle a year will play to some pop culture hallmark or another, and while this episode did at least toy around with the concept in having Castle bid on the locker in question, it didn't exactly tear into the culture of storage-locker plundering that seems so easily ripe for mocking. Hell, you could do an entire episode around a Dave Hester type killing for a storage locker, and I'd probably watch.

Apart from a bit of up-bidding from a mysterious Russian fellow, and a brief cameo from 30 Rock's Dot Com (Kevin Brown) as another would-be bidder on the locker, that was pretty much the end of the storage-auction referencing. After Castle outbid the Russian, the team began systematically sifting through all the junk inside, but to no real avail. All anyone found of value was a creepy little doll that nobody in the office seemed to like much... except for Captain Gates. Suddenly, Gates' hard edges were buffed smooth when she saw the wretched little thing. Castle, sensing an opportunity to get in her good graces, offered her the doll at no cost. The wide-eyed look of utter disbelief on Penny Johnson Jerald's face was literally the closest thing we've had to character development for Captain Gates since the character debuted.

Where the episode went from there was less interesting, though ultimately buoyed by some good scenes from Nathan Fillion with both Stana Katic and Molly Quinn. We learned that although Castle's mother and daughter now know of his relationship, the folks at work still don't. So when they're at work, Castle and Beckett have taken to elaborate handshakes to emulate public displays of affection. While we only got a few moments of fleeting romantic flirtation, the two actors were able to do more with a stare and a handshake than many actors manage with a full-on love scene. As for Quinn, this episode marked Alexis's departure from Castle's nest as she left for college. The Castle/Alexis stuff occasionally borders on obnoxiously sappy, but last night, it mostly stayed genuinely sweet. The two had a particularly nice moment in Alexis's dorm room as they said their sort-of-goodbyes. I like Quinn, and I'm glad the writers are paying a bit of attention to Alexis now after mostly ignoring her for the first two episodes of the season. Hopefully the college storyline bears some worthwhile fruit.

As for the mystery, the whole thing delved into some strange territory involving the brother's former employer, insurance fraud, and a mysterious glass eye, found within the doll Castle gave to Captain Gates. It turned out the killer had caused an accident that killed the twins' parents ten years earlier, and they were killed over evidence that proved his guilt. Namely, the glass eye, which contained his DNA. Yeah, I didn't really see things going in that direction either.

It was a limp ending for an otherwise entertaining episode of Castle. If nothing else, "Secret's Safe With Me" made it official that Castle and Beckett's coupling has done nothing to ruin the goofy crime-solving fun of the show. Now if the writers could just churn out some slightly more interesting mystery plots, we'd be golden.

– Have I mentioned yet how good Stana Katic has been this season? Several times already? Good. I'll just say it one more time. Stana Katic has been pretty damn good this season.

– Seeing Johnson Jerald go from scowling menace to gushing excitement and then back to scowling menace was a real rollercoaster ride, though not really the fun kind. Can we not do that again?

– Nathan Fillion moment of the week: It's a toss-up between him excitedly getting to say "The butler did it!" and the half smile, half look of terror on his face when his mother exclaimed that she would be remaining at his home indefinitely, so he'll "never be alone again." *shudder*

– For as generally happy as I've been with the chemistry between Fillion and Katic this season, my girlfriend (who got me into this show in the first place) cannot deal with it. She has completely sworn off the show, because she finds the dynamic just "too weird." Any advice on how to handle this? I don't know if I can watch this entire season alone...

What'd you think of the episode?

Castle "Secret's Safe With Me" Photos

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