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This summer, Fox will launch an Adult Swim-esque "alternative animated programming block" called Animation Domination Hi-Def (ADHD, har), and featuring several new 15-minute animated series. One of those series will be Axe Cop, based on the popular web comic created in late 2009 by a five-year-old kid named Malachi and his 29-year-old brother, Ethan. As the story goes, Ethan and Malachi were playing pretend one day when Malachi invented the Axe Cop character; Ethan, a graphic artist, decided to transform his little bro's ideas into a web comic as a way of practicing the medium. And so was born an epic tale of an axe-wielding police officer whose adventures involve everything from babysitting to fighting zombies, dinosaurs, and robots.    

Here's the official logline for the show:

Operating on only two minutes of sleep a night and fueled by a diet consisting solely of birthday cake, awesome superhero AXE COP and his loyal partner, FLUTE COP, unleash their unique brand of vigilante justice on bad guys everywhere.

And here's the first official trailer, released this weekend at WonderCon:

Um, Parks and Recreation's Nick Offerman is voicing Axe Cop himself? And Giancarlo Esposito, Jonathan Banks, Ken Marino, Patton Oswalt, and Megan Mullally are also involved in the project? Sign me up. 

Axe Cop premieres as part of Fox's ADHD animation block on Saturday, July 27 at 11pm. 

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The Walking Dead's Season 3 finale airs tonight at 9pm. Game of Thrones' Season 3 premiere airs tonight at... 9pm. And after seeing the internet's latest take on the Syrio Forel "not today" meme, we have a feeling we know where most people's priorities lie. But that won't stop us from asking anyway...

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It's almost heeeeeeeere. The Vampire Diaries' Klaus-centric spin-off The Originals, that is. The backdoor pilot is set to air as the April 25 episode of TVD, and as of today there's an official synopsis and a handful of episodic photos to peruse! Ahoy:

KLAUS RETURNS TO HIS PAST IN NEW ORLEANS — Acting on a mysterious tip that a plot is brewing against him in New Orleans, Klaus (Joseph Morgan) makes a trip to the town he and his family helped build. Klaus’s questions lead him to a reunion with his former protégé, Marcel (guest-star Charles Michael Davis), a charismatic vampire who has total control over the human and supernatural inhabitants of New Orleans. Determined to help his brother find redemption, Elijah (Daniel Gillies) follows Klaus and soon learns that Hayley (guest-star Phoebe Tonkin) has also come to the French Quarter searching for clues to her family history, and has fallen into the hands of a powerful witch named Sophie (guest star Daniella Pineda). Meanwhile, in Mystic Falls, Damon (Ian Somerhalder) and Stefan (Paul Wesley) continue with their plan for Elena (Nina Dobrev), while Katherine (Nina Dobrev) reveals a surprising vulnerability to Rebekah (Claire Holt) and asks her to deliver a message. Chris Grismer directed the episode written by Julie Plec (#420).

Okay, so there isn't all that much new info to go on. But there seems to be a lot of love out there for Elijah, and Klaus certainly has his moments. So there's definitely potential, right?

Anyway, here are those photos I promised you! Caution: There is a LOT of intent staring ahead.

Photos from The Vampire Diaries: "The Originals"

Alright guys, go nuts. What's your excitement level for this thing?

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New Girl S02E21: "First Date"

Dermot Mulroney returned to New Girl as Russell, Jess's fancyman ex-boyfriend, and upon running into Jess and Nick in the middle of their first date, exclaimed, "Glad to see this is finally happening!" Word, Fancyman, word. Even though Jess and Nick's first official date was more awkward than awesome, the important thing is that it happened; sure, neither Nick nor Jess seemed at all pleased with where they ended up at the end of the night, but tentative first steps were taken and all that. 

Or, you know, fourth steps. After all, Jess and Nick have had their first kiss and their make-out sessions. They did their touchy-feely-supportive-partner thing at Nick's dad's funeral. For all intents and purposes, they fit the definition of a romantic couple in everything but name, a situation that lends itself well to creating the sort of confusion and chaos Schmidt and Winston feared could destroy the good chemistry of the four roommates, and prompted Nick to continue his trend of being a Responsible Adult by asking Jess out on a real date.

Or not. After a smooth (and touching!) rehearsal with Tran (Hi, Tran!), Nick fumbled through the ask with Jess and wound up woefully overdressed for what Jess assumed would be a friendly stop at a sidewalk food cart, not a formal dinner at a total swank-fest. I was okay with overdressed Nick, though. Jake Johnson cleans up fiiiiine. 

Also, LOL at "wearing Schmidt." 

Jess and Nick's first date quickly mutated into three separate outings that seemed to act as a microcosm of their entire relationship this season. Confused about the nature of their dinner, Jess rolled with it. She didn't understand whether it was a date or dinner with a friend, or why Nick was so dressed up—not to mention incapable of accurately communicating his intentions to her—but it worked because what happened at the restaurant was basically the early days of Jess and Nick's relationship on a smaller scale. 

Then Fancyman showed up. To anyone else, it would have been a random encounter with a former romantic interest: mildly uncomfortable, but not necessarily an evening-killer, considering Russell and Jess parted on somewhat amiable terms. It's not like one of them cheated or he was some kind of creepy stalker-ex. They simply realized that they weren't as compatible as they thought and ended the relationship. It sucked and it was sad, but those things happen all the time. 

Still, the blast from Jess's past upset the tentative balance between Jess and Nick and they ditched the fine dining for date number two: drinking at the bar as friends. They were more at ease with one another, firmly back in their respective comfort zones, with the bar stop representing the stability of their relationship prior to The Kiss That Changed Everything in "Cooler." After getting good and drunk on booze and each other's company, Jess and Nick decided to stick it to the past and return to the table they'd fled in order to finish their real live date... which brought them right back to confronting the current state of their relationship... which again, neither of them was adequately prepared to do. 

Cue Russell with an assist, whipping out two pens ("That's the move, right there!") and paper and making Nick and Jess write down in secret what they thought their date meant. His decision to ultimately NOT share their scribbles with the rest of the class raises two possibilities: 

1. Russell was counting on Nick and Jess writing similar answers that confirmed their mushy soulmate status and decided not to risk crushing them with the truth when their beliefs didn't align. 

2. Russell planned to leave them in the dark the entire time in an attempt to force Jess and Nick to communicate honestly with each other—an essential aspect of any healthy and successful relationship and one that Jess and Nick haven't yet managed to master. 

Personally, I'm pulling for door number two just because the idea of Nick and Jess NOT being on the same page is too sad, and between Jess's conversation with Cece and Nick's with Tran, it appears that Nick and Jess DO share the same feelings. They just suck at sharing those feelings with each other. 

Regardless of Russell's intentions, the truth about what Jess and Nick wrote remained elusive, and even though they managed a heart-to-heart of sorts on the sidewalk where they resolved to stop doing the things the other one found arousing—Jess asking Nick for help and Nick gargling his beer—once they got home, they couldn't help but fall back into their old habits. However, rather than act on their feelings, they each went their separate ways, even though it clearly made them both miserable.

While the good ship Nessy (Nick + Jess + messy) got caught in the doldrums, back on dry land, Winston and Schmidt prepared for the eventuality of that ship docking in a safe harbor. Their ploy to destroy Nick and Jess's date in the name of saving the dynamics of the loft eventually came to involve Outside Dave (Steve Agee) after Winston recalled his worst dating experience ever: a tableside serenade by a homeless dude. They bartered a deal where Outside Dave would give Nick and Jess the same treatment in exchange for twenty-five minutes of TV time and a homemade sandwich, but TV time turned into lavatory time and rather than work together to ruin date night, Winston and Schmidt had to work together to get Outside Dave out of their bathroom. 

In addition to worrying about a Jess/Nick relationship ruining their living arrangement, Winston and Schmidt had a much more personal motive for keeping Nick and Jess apart: They didn't think they were capable of being friends with one another without Nick to bring them together. It was a ridiculous notion, even with the flashback evidence to confirm their apparent incompatibility, because we've seen them get along just swell without Nick throughout the series, especially in recent episodes. Even though the moral of the story—that Winston and Schmidt ARE friends with one another and are perfectly capable of surviving without Nick around—was a given from the very beginning, it was still satisfying to see them arrive at that conclusion themselves, especially since Nick and Jess are stuck in a rut at the moment.

What did you think of "Date Night"?

– One-liner of the night: "Whiskey was a nickel! Whores caked in mud!" —Nick, on the Old West

– Nick: "I have a question about my clothes." Schmidt: "Burn them. Burn them all."

– Among Schmidt and Winston's plans to sabotage Jess and Nick's date, Winston proposed shooting a bear full of Hep-C and setting it free in the restaurant. I like your just-a-touch-too-much style, Winston.

– I wasn't aware that the Pledge of Allegiance could be sexual. You learn something new everyday. 

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The power may be out on Revolution, but NBC hasn't turned the show's lights off just yet! Ryan King's wife may be dead on Go On, but his show is still kickin'! And The New Normal may feature one of television's worst new characters and exist mainly as a vessel for creator Ryan Murphy's personal views, but... it got picked up for a full season!

NBC, the network that started its 2012-2013 TV season early by premiering some of its new shows in August, made the first decisions regarding the fates of its freshman today by handing out full-season orders to three fast-starters: Revolution, Go On, and The New Normal. That means all three series will add nine episodes to their original 13-episode orders for a total of 22 episodes each.

Revolution, despite some pretty crummy reviews from yours truly, is a ratings hit in its timeslot behind The Voice, averaging a 3.6 rating in the adult demo and 9.8 million viewers. Go On is almost as beefy, with a 3.2 rating average and 8.6 million viewers per week. More confusing is the pickup of The New Normal, which is pulling in an average rating of 2.2 and 6 million viewers. Those aren't horrible numbers, but are they early pickup numbers? Nope. Look, I don't want to spread rumors, but I'm going to: That's the power of Ryan Murphy, who NBC probably doesn't want to upset in the name of keeping its options open for the future.

I'm guessing Revolution will start to fall dramatically in the ratings pretty quickly as the internet chatter has turned to groans, but the early numbers are no surprise for a mysterious genre show. Go On has exceeded my expectations in both ratings and quality, so I'm all for that. But The New Normal? What I've seen needs a lot of work.

Let's hear your thoughts on these pickups! What do you like? What do you hate?

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The CW loves to brag about how some of its shows are the most Socially Media'd shows on television right now (search #TVD on Thursday nights and your Twitter feed might make your computer beg for mercy), and it would like to get a head start on TwitBook with its upcoming drama Cult. The network has posted the pilot online over at CW.com and Hulu for free (we've embedded it below, just note that it's probably only available to U.S. residents), so stop what you're doing and gives this wacky show a shot.

Cult stars Matt Davis (The Vampire Diaries) as a "journalist blogger" who investigates a string of mysterious incidents surrounding a popular television show. He's joined by one of the show's production assistants, and soon the duo learns the show's fans are re-enacting some of the show's more nefarious elements. But the real treat is the show-within-the-show, which stars Robert Knepper as a crazed and charismatic cult leader and Alona Tal as a cop trying to take him down.

It's been months since I've seen the pilot but I remember thinking that it has the potential to be a lot of fun, especially for fans of The CW. Check it out and let us know what you think in the comments!

Cult premieres on Tuesday, February 19 at 9pm on The CW.

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First the Nets leave New Jersey, then Jersey Shore returns to disappointing ratings, and now CBS's Made in Jersey has been canceled. Jersey Pride is taking a beating.

CBS has made the first awkward phone call of the 2012 fall season, pulling Made in Jersey from its schedule effective immediately. The legal drama about a street-smart lawyer from New York's jealous cousin has been airing on Friday nights at 9pm; last Friday marked the series' second episode. Made in Jersey actually won the hour in total viewers with its last episode by drawing 6.78 million viewers. But it still had that CBS problem and finished fourth with just a 0.8 rating in the adult demo. Hey, at least it beat a Hart of Dixie repeat!

This bloodshed is the first of what has been a kinder, gentler opening month of the new fall season. Five shows (NBC's Go On, The New Normal, and Revolution and Fox's The Mindy Project and Ben and Kate) have all been given full-season orders.

Made in Jersey's 9pm timeslot will go to CSI: NY, which slides back an hour from hour. Undercover Boss will take over the vacated Friday-at-8pm slot when it returns for Season 4 on November 2.

If you're participating in our Dead Pool, this news is a bit of an upset—Friday shows are usually given a longer leash, as poor ratings come with the territory. Made in Jersey will be worth 11 points (two episodes aired, so it's 13 – 2 = 11). No, I did not have it as one of my picks and I'm pretty bummed about it. But now it's so obvious! Arghhhh! I mean, CBS let A Gifted Man rot for months before it got canceled in the same time slot last year!

Other shows that are likely candidates for cancellation include Fox's The Mob Doctor, CBS's Partners, and NBC's Guys With Kids.

Did anyone here watch Made in Jersey?

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The Voice S03E11: "The Battles Premiere"

With the teams set, it was time to kick off The Voice's Battle Rounds, where musicians compete against their own teammates for a spot on their judge's reduced roster. The process every bit as awkward as the set-up implies, and the part of me that's hesitant to buy into the notion of pure competition on The Voice has always kind of looked at the Battle Rounds as each judge's last opportunity to deal with any buyer's remorse he or she may have struggled with after the Blind Auditions. I mean, sometimes the battles are so clearly stacked in one musician's favor that it's hard to imagine it happened accidentally.

But with that said, there were some pleasant surprises last night! I thought that De'Borah was surely a goner when paired with Sting sound-alike Nelly's Echo on, surprise surprise, a Police song. Billy Joe Armstrong claimed that "Message in a Bottle" was "tailor made" for Nelly, seemingly cementing De'Borah's fate, a potential storyline that The Voice was more than happy to emphasize with footage of the self-proclaimed "misfit" floundering in rehearsals.

With so much buildup dedicated to the natural awesomeness of Nelly's Echo and the apparent shortcomings of De'Borah, I can honestly say that I was surprised when we entered battle and from the jump, Nelly just wasn't that great. He seemed nervous in contrast to De'Borah's sudden case of overflowing confidence and while neither performance blew me out of the water, hers was certainly the most fun to watch. What she lacked in rehearsals, she made up for during the performance, and really, that's the part that matters, right?

Casey Muessignmann and Terry McDermott also brought actual competition to the stage with their "Carry on My Wayward Son" duet. I thought that Casey would be the shoo-in since, as we're reminded every single freaking week, Blake Shelton wants to win with a country singer this season because as we all know, country music is a heavily marginalized and overlooked genre that deserves greater exposure and a bigger audience. It's not like it's one of the most popular music genres in the U.S. with legions of fans, legendary artists, and it's very own awards show.

Anyway, I figured Casey and his cowboy hat would be the victors in their musical tussle with Scottish rocker Terry McDermott, and joking aside, I thought Casey did quite well while Terry just seemed to scream a lot. However, Blake felt that the safer bet was Terry, who already "knows who he is" musically.

Team Blake's second battle of the night pitted country against country with mother-daughter duo 2 Steel Girls facing off against Gracia Harrison on the Dixie Chicks tune "Sin Wagon." Like De'Borah, Gracia struggled in rehearsals but outshined her teammates/rivals with confidence that translated to a seemingly carefree performance.

YouTube sensation J.R. Aquino competed against Diego Val for a spot on Team Cee Lo. Their rehearsal footage tried hard to push the same underdog status on Val, but his performance lacked the same astronomical jump in confidence and execution that made the other underdogs of the night seem so much more amazing than their rehearsal struggles let on. He was GOOD, but so was Aquino. Cee Lo's decision was practically forced to be arbitrary.

Collin McLoughlin of Team Adam and Amanda Brown of Team Cee Lo were also cut from their respective teams, but found themselves saved by the newest addition to The Voice's format, THE STEAL. While I generally like the idea—I think—after seeing it in practice I think it's a kind of odd thing to be included in rounds that exist solely to thin the herd. Each judge can only steal two eliminated singers, a restriction I'm sure is intended to guard against padding one's ranks indefinitely. Still, the thought of eliminating two team members just to fill the places with two steals seems kind of silly.

Despite the out-of-place feel of The Steal though, I'm glad to see Collin McLoughlin and Amanda Brown stay, or at least Amanda. Her duet with Trevin Hunte on Mariah Carey's "Vision of Love" was fantastic. The biggest draw was absolutely Trevin's amazing high-notes, but if she had been paired with anyone BUT Trevin, I'm certain Amanda would have been Cee Lo's pick instead of the newest addition to Team Adam (not that Team Adam is a bad team to be on by any means.)

After battling Bryan Keith on "Santeria," Collin McLoughlin joined Team Blake after being stolen from Team Adam, though to be fair, the steal was initiated by Adam's dismissal of him. When you look at it like that, The Steal seems less like a delightfully devious competitive strategy and more like foraging for leftovers.

What do you think of The Steal so far?

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Bob's Burgers S03E02: "Full Bars"

Bob's Burgers did its first Halloween-themed show tonight, joining the long history of Fox's animated series celebrating the holiday with a dedicated episode. As far as first forays into the tradition go, "Full Bars" was a solid one, even if I have some quibbles.

Teddy's "Black and Orange" party was where the episode stumbled a little bit. I love send-ups of the "murder investigations at a party" scenario, but I never felt like "Full Bars" committed to it all that well. There were good bits to be had—I liked Teddy comparing shoes to the deceased guinea pig Francis, and the realization that Teddy and Francis essentially had matching costumes cracked me up—but they never amounted to a satisfying whole.

The biggest fault may've been with the climax, or lack thereof. The decision to shift the blame to both Bob rolling all over Francis and Teddy spray-painting her left the whole event feeling sort of wasted, without much of a punchline. Everyone just wandered off, and then Linda recounted the tale to the kids when they arrived home.

But with that said, it wasn't that big of an issue in the long run since the rest of the episode was such a treat.

After being thwarted in their own neighborhood (receiving oyster crackers, order numbers at the deli, and seaweed candy from Mr. Frond), the kids took advantage of their first solo trick-or-treating excursion and decided to head across the bay to Kingshead Island, where the upper-class families live ("Rich people are better at Halloween." "And skin care!").

I think it's really to the show's credit that it didn't engage in some intense class-warfare comedy. The episode was defter than that, painting Kingshead Island as a more complicated place than just "where the rich people live." Milo and Ned's costumes weren't particularly inventive compared to the Belchers', and they even recognized Gene's masterful Queen Latifah costume (while failing to identify Tina as a mommy mummy). These weren't snobby kids. Even Bryce and his gang weren't concerned with the fact that the Belchers were from the mainland. They just saw some young kids out past the Halloween curfew, prime targets for the Hell Hunt ("IT'S HELEN HUNT!!!").

Most of the humor was actually mined from the Belchers' amazement at full-sized candy bars ("How did this not topple your economy?!"), and they even came off in a slightly poorer light than Milo or Ned after they took more than one candy bar from the Wagners' self-serve candy bowl. While this sort of thing could come off as mean-spirited, making fun of blue-collar kids, I feel like the show has earned these moments over the course of its brief run—the strength of the family, and its neighborhood, has routinely been connected to its lower economic rung. The kids were be a bit out of place, and it was ultimately their outsider status that allowed them to turn the tables on Bryce's gang.

So Bob's gave us a decent bag of candy for its first outing at Halloween, and hopefully it'll just be the first of many.

– "Maybe means maybe, Bob. It doesn't mean 'I'm too scared to say no.'"

– Specials board: The Jack-O-Lentil burger.

– "Right. Left. Kill. Kill." "You know it's a limp, Teddy."

– Bryce and his gang were so lame that they even made a tired The Warriors reference. Amanda was totally right to ignore him.

– "I can pee on myself. I don't need any handouts."

– Louise's slo-mo throw of Amanda's phone into her passing car and it missing? That's the sort of punchline that was missing from the Teddy's party plot.

– A quick programming note: Since it's October, that means it's time for the MLB postseason, and that means Fox's schedule gets a little wonky. There'll be no Bob's Burgers (or any Fox animated programming, for that matter) next Sunday, but it'll be back on Oct. 21.

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Parks and Recreation returns for its fifth season tonight, and a super-secret, little-known fact about TV shows returning for new seasons is that a lot of times the stars of the TV shows that are returning for new seasons will do a bunch of press to promote the fact that their TV shows are returning for new seasons. The more you know. Anyway, yesterday I had a chance to briefly interview Parks and Rec's Aubrey Plaza and Adam Scott about the show's new season. And I love Parks and Rec and I love Aubrey Plaza and Adam Scott, so obviously I jumped at the chance.

The following video is the result. Things start out normal, with me asking boilerplate questions about the new season (note to self: write better interview questions!), and then the interview takes a turn for the (delightfully!) weird and all of a sudden we're doing a podcast sponsored by the bible. Before you watch, please know these things:

1. Aubrey Plaza and Adam Scott are very funny. Me, less so. Remember when Price interviewed Candice Accola from The Vampire Diaries and got all starstruck? I was starstruck and then some, which is my only excuse for starting the interview by getting the season number wrong and ending it with an awkward comment about how Adam Scott as Ben wore a Batman costume last season.

2. This was a satellite interview, which means Aubrey and Adam were answering my questions on camera while I spoke to them via phone (they're wearing earpieces); I couldn't see them and they couldn't see me, hence some of the weird interruptions and Adam Scott checking his phone in the beginning. They miiiight have been told I'd be transcribing this "for print." But the video was good so I decided to post it, unedited, for your viewing pleasure.

Okay, I'll shut up now. Ladies and gentlemen Adam Scott and Aubrey Plaza!

Parks and Recreation returns for Season 4 tonight at 9:30pm on NBC.

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The summer hiatus has been so long and unbearable you'd be forgiven for just pushing The Vampire Diaries out of your mind entirely. I mean, despite rumors and assumptions and best guesses, the new season has all been so maddeningly theoretical! Well, ever so slowly, Season 4 of our favorite vampire saga has begun to get a little more REAL. First came last week's teaser, and now we've got the first official photos from season premiere "Growing Pains." THIS IS HAPPENING.

Now, we know at least a few things will be dealt with in the premiere: Caroline's relationship with Klaus-as-Tyler will get weird; Bonnie will attempt to use magic to undo Elena's vampirism; Rebekah will be in a whole heap of trouble; Stefan will have some presumably mixed emotions. But let's be honest, until the episode airs none of us has ANY idea of what might happen. That being said, below are my best guesses as to what exactly is going on in these photos! (And don't worry, the original, un-touched/un-bastardized versions—plus several additional images—can be found in the galleries below.) Here goes!

Klaus-as-Tyler will attempt to distract Caroline's suspicions by taking his shirt off a ton.

Stefan will make a new best friend.

Bonnie will do what Bonnie does best. (Save lives and/or mess things up.)

Rebekah will be in trouble for standing in the road that one time.

Jeremy will use his bro-genuity to get Bonnie to do a better job at witchcraft.

Bonnie will ruin another blouse.

Guys, I DON'T KNOW. I have no inside knowledge. I am not a psychic and Kevin Williamson stopped responding to my pages in 1997 ("*911* U KILLD RANDY?? *911*"). Your guess is as good as mine as to what the heck is going on here. All I know is that I'm super-stoked that this show is almost back. Hurry, show!

Oh, and here are those galleries with the rest of the new images from Season 4. LOOK AT THESE and TELL ME WHAT WILL HAPPEN in this episode!

The Vampire Diaries Season 4 Premiere Photos

The Vampire Diaries Season 4 Cast Photos

The Vampire Diaries Season 4 premieres Thursday, October 11 at 8pm on The CW.

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The first 20 minutes are free, the rest you gotta pay for. Showtime is playing pusher by offering up an extended sneak peek at the Season 2 premiere of its outstanding series Homeland in advance of the episode's September 30 debut. The free look is open to all (though likely limited by geographic region), and because we're nice, we've embedded it below.

To catch you up on where things left off, Brody's plot to blow up the vice president was thwarted by his daughter, and Carrie opted to have her brain fried via electro-shock therapy as treatment for her bipolar disorder rather than be obsessed with crazy notions that Brody is working for Abu Nazir.

The real threat to global peace? Carrie Matheson teaching ESL students!

Homeland Season 2 premieres September 30 at 10pm on Showtime.

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Do you smell that? It's the smell of death! And it's coming from your TV set. No, it's not the possum that crawled up in your flatscreen and died, it's the abundance of new, not-so-good-looking television shows that will soon debut on the major networks and then find themselves pushing up headstones as they fail spectacularly. MUAHAHAHAHA!

Which is to say, welcome to the 2nd Annual TV.com Dead Pool, where we all come together to revel in the misery of others. This is an interactive game where you predict which new shows will be canceled first. Are you ready? Let's begin.

– This year, we've made it much easier for you to pick your shows and, more importantly, for me to keep score. Gone are the hand-drawn spreadsheets and abacuses; instead we've built some sweet web-based tools and an automated leaderboard. If you've ever dabbled in creating your own TV.com viewing lineup, you'll be familiar with the layout. And if you have at least two brain cells, you'll probably understand it, too. In the widget below, drag and drop the five shows you think will be canceled first into the blank spots, and then pick a tiebreaker—the show you think will be first to earn a full-season pickup. (For lots more detail on how the game works, see the "Rules" section, below.) The shows are tabbed out by network, so don't forget to click over to see what NBC has to offer because the network is a goldmine for points.

– Once you make your picks, they're automatically saved in the system and good to go. (They're also shareable; we won't be sad if you post them to MySpace and Friendster... or Facebook and Twitter, your call.) If you decide you want to change your picks, simply drag a new show over the one you want to replace and let the magic of the internet handle the rest.

– The shows eligible for the Dead Pool are those that premiere during the major networks' fall premiere season (September through the end of November). No midseason shows are eligible, and no cable shows are eligible.

– Entries will lock after September 30, meaning you can enter (and edit) your lineup up until that date. Because ABC and The CW have several premieres after that date, you'll just have to guess at their chances without seeing a full episode.

– The competition is open to all registered TV.com users. IMPORTANT: Please make sure the email address affiliated with your TV.com account is up to date so that we may contact you in the event that 1) you win, 2) there's a problem with your entry, or 3) we want to make fun of you for picking The Mindy Project as one of the shows that will be canceled first.

– The concept is simple: Pick five new shows you think will be canceled first, talk some trash to your friends, and get to some hate-watching! We're not as interested in exactly when shows get canceled as we are in how soon they're canceled. Because all the new shows premiere at different times, scoring is based on how many episodes of a series have aired before its demise. The fewer episodes that make it to air, the more points the show is worth. Points for all your shows will be tallied, and the user with the most points wins.

– New shows typically begin with a 13-episode order, so we calculate each show's score by counting backward from 13 according to how many episodes have aired once a show's cancellation is announced. Wait, don't freak out, it's not THAT confusing! Let me give you an example. Let's say NBC's new comedy Six Hot Friends Having Sex in New York gets canceled after airing four episodes. We take 13 (the number of episodes in the initial order) and subtract four for the number of episodes that did air. That means Six Hot Friends Having Sex in New York is worth nine (13 – 4 = 9) points. Another example: If CBS's Doctor Cop Lawyer is canceled after 10 episodes, it's worth three points (13 – 10 = 3). Get it? Of course you do. Points are only awarded once a cancellation is announced.

– Cancellations aren't always made official by networks that are trying to save face, but it's quite obvious when a show is technically canceled, even if a network says it isn't. If a show gets moved to Saturdays at 11pm or is "temporarily removed from the schedule," it's is as good as canceled, and the TV.com edit team will have the final say on what is and what isn't canceled and how many episodes aired. We'll also make final determinations on any other wacky network decisions, such as a show being canceled and then uncanceled. Our decisions are final, because we rule.

– If you choose a show that gets picked up for a full season, that's bad. You'll lose two points for that. For example, let's say Fox's Quirky Girl Is Unlucky in Love becomes a big hit and gets a full-season order at any time during its run. Those who selected it as one of their five shows headed for cancellation will get two points deducted from their score, because this is a Dead Pool, not a Success Pool. With such a large field of participants, entries that choose a show that gets picked up have almost zero chance of winning.

– Because lots of people can tell when a show stinks, there are bound to be ties. We have a tiebreaker for that! After you pick the five shows you think will be canceled, you'll select a sixth show that you think will be the first to earn a full-season pickup (the opposite of what you were predicting with the other five shows). Do not forget to do this! Multiple entrants lost out last year because they didn't pick a tiebreaker or they didn't pay attention to the rules. This pick does not count toward your overall score, it's only used as a tiebreaker.

– There will be prizes! Assorted schwag from the TV.com offices will find its way to the lucky winners. (Note: Unfortunately, authorities with legal power only allow prizes to go to American residents, so foreigners should work on getting that green card now in order to have a chance at winning a Breaking In notebook that TV.com Managing Editor Jen Trolio has half scribbled in. [Ed. note: It's a Game of Thrones "The North Remembers" notebook, thankyouverymuch. But it is half scribbled in.]

This page right here is officially Dead Pool HQ. You'll see the Dead Pool picks widget at the top. It's where we'll eventually post a leaderboard, as well as news and updates.

– While the general rule of thumb should be "bad shows will get canceled first," that's not always the case. Americans don't always have the best taste. Have you seen the two guys running for president? I mean, come on! Consider a show's potential for mass appeal when picking.

– Don't forget to consider the individual networks! CBS will make its decisions a lot differently than The CW because CBS is loaded with successful shows. CBS will keep a short leash, whereas a CW show can go eight seasons before the network realizes it stinks.

– Don't forget to take note of where new shows fit on the schedule (check out our fall schedule analysis to see what shows will be up against what other shows). Choosing a new series that's up against NCIS is a lot smarter than choosing one that's up against Whitney.

– Don't forget to encourage your friends to play, and once your picks are made click on the Twitter, Facebook, and Google Plus icons to share them with the world. There's also an old-school URL to send to your friends that will show them your picks and take them directly to the Dead Pool homepage. The wonders of technology!

– Good luck, and it is MANDATORY that you have fun. If you do not have fun, you will be removed from the contest and shot into space. With Mario Lopez.

– Here's Your 2012 Fall TV Schedule, Day by Day

– Trailers and descriptions for ABC's new shows!

– Trailers and descriptions for CBS's new shows!

– Trailers and descriptions for The CW's new shows!

– Trailers and descriptions for Fox's new shows!

– Trailers and descriptions for NBC's new shows!

– Watch the Pilot for J.J. Abrams' Revolution Online Now

– Watch the Pilot for Ryan Murphy's The Normal Online Now

– Watch the Premieres of the The Mindy Project and Ben and Kate Online Now

– Watch the First Episode of Animal Practice Now

– Watch the First Episode of Matthew Perry's Go On Now

– Finally, for inspiration, watch this clip. If you want to play the game, you better know the rules.

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